The answer is always YES

When my daughter was a baby, and Ace of Cakes was on TV, I decided I needed to learn to decorate cakes. So I took a class at Michaels and learned how to pipe and make a buttercream rose. I made some birthday cakes, and then somebody asked me to do her wedding cake.

What she said was, "Do you do wedding cakes?" The answer was yes. Of course I do!

So I did.

A little later, when my cousin sent me this photo and asked if I could do it, the answer was yes.

Of course I can.

 In reality I had no idea how to do this:

Or this:

But that didn't stop me from doing this:

The year handmade scarves were all the rage, I'd never crocheted or knitted a stitch in my life.

That didn't stop me from gifting handmade scarves to everybody on my Christmas list.

The word "can't" was never allowed in my house growing up. My dad told me once, "There's no such thing as can't. There's will or won't. So either look me in the eye and say that you won't, or quit whining and do it."

Can I run a business, even though I've never taken a business class? Yes.

Can I write a novel in 30 days? Yes.

Can I do whatever it is your Marketing Manager or Content Wizard or Social Media Guru needs to do? Yes.

If it can be done, I can do it. And if it can't be done, well...we'll see about that.

A warning to my laundry.

Fair Warning.

If you are fabric in my house that is not nailed down, you will be put through the washing machine when you become dirty. And you will become dirty. This is certain.

If you have one of those fussy, entitled tags demanding you be "hand washed only" or even "dry cleaned only" (in the case of the latter, I don't know how you got here in the first place, and I'm sorry for the things you're about to see), you may be afforded the luxury of the "delicates" cycle, if I'm in a generous mood. But you will be washed.

Most of you will make it through just fine.

And those of you who don't? I'm sorry, but trust me when I say it's for the best. This ain't the life for you, princess.

"Let Alone." Use it right.

"Let alone."

I keep seeing it used wrong and it. is. driving. me. nuts.

pics on Sodahead

PSA: "Let alone" does not mean "not even."

Here is a wrong usage: "I wouldn't follow you across the country, let alone down the street."

You could replace "let alone" here with a version of "not even": "I wouldn't follow you across the country, or even down the street." That would be correct.

That's not what "let alone" is for.

"Let alone" means "certainly not" or "especially not" or, perhaps most clearly, "much less." MUCH LESS. In other words, it's exactly the opposite of the above uses.

If you say "I wouldn't follow you across the country, much less down the street," what does that mean? I wouldn't follow you all the way across the country, probably, but I'm much less likely to follow you down the street? That's not what you mean to say, surely. You mean to make a contrast for emphasis...

"Why would I follow you all the way across the country? Dude. I wouldn't even follow you down the street!"

Correct usage: "I wouldn't follow you down the street, let alone across the country."

See? The first thing is minor...the second thing is major. It's a contrast. I wouldn't do the first thing, so I would be MUCH LESS likely to do the second, bigger version of that thing. I wouldn't EVEN follow you down the street...LET ALONE all the way across the country.

Stop using it backwards. It makes me crazy. I know you don't want to make me crazy, Internet. So stop it.

I'm here to help you stop making me crazy. You're welcome.

WAHMs have all the fun. And also all the work. Or whatever.

I don't talk much about my work in this space. But it's something that's been weighing on my mind a lot lately.

I love my job. I do. I get to handle the social media presence of a university, and it's really a wonderful adventure. I oversee a staff of fantastic student bloggers who amaze me every day with their insight and personality and passion for life. And I get paid to spend large parts of my day on Facebook and on Twitter and reading great blogs. How many people can say that?

So all things considered, I truly love what I do. But the thing is, I have these kids, you know?

The Monster, 17 months

The Princess, turning 6 this month!

And, well...I miss them when I'm at work.

When I became pregnant with my daughter almost 7 years ago, I was able to convert my job from full-time to half-time. I was very happy with that schedule. Yes, it required considerable sacrifice, because I gave up half my salary along with half my hours, and frankly, I did not give up half my workload; I had to do almost as much work in half the time, for half the pay. But we made it work, and I believed it was worth the sacrifices. I felt kind of balanced and whole.

After two years of that, some of my job duties shifted and I agreed to come back full-time, on the condition that I would be allowed to work 20 of my hours from home. This? Was kind of wonderful. I got my full salary back, and enough hours in the day to do my job without giving myself a heart attack, but I still had the flexibility and freedom to be at home with my daughter for many of her daylight hours. And my entire family thrived.

Working from home certainly has its own set of challenges. Teaching my toddler to entertain herself so Mommy could work was one of the most difficult things I've ever done. But I did it, and I think she's better for it. She's strong and independent and creative and imaginative, and I was there to see all of that. I also received nearly perfect performance evaluations during this time; the autonomy of my schedule really brought out the best in me, at home and at work.

When my son was born I continued this half-time in the office, half-time at home schedule, and once again had to reevalute my time management and routines, but again, I made it work.

Things have changed recently, though. My workplace no longer allows telecommuting. So last summer I had to rearrange my life one more time, find full-day childcare, and now I'm in the office all day every day.

It's hard. As much as I love my job, I miss the work-at-home mom I used to be. I miss getting up and booting up my laptop in my pajamas, snuggling with my kids while they watch cartoons and eat breakfast and I check my email and start my day. I miss watching my daughter teach her baby brother how to walk, talk, and play. I miss so many of these moments now, and it's difficult.

OK, maybe I don't so much miss "Moooooommmm, I'm huuuuuuungry" just as I begin a conference call. But overall, I do miss being a work-at-home mom. I'm not saying it's easy; just that, for me, it's worth it.

I'm hopeful that there are solutions still waiting to be found. That this is a temporary crossroads in my life, this full-time office job. As much as I adore what I do, I can't shake the knowledge that I could be doing it just as effectively and so much more contentedly from my home. The knowledge that I am committed to my career, but my career is not who I am. The knowledge that my babies are growing up and I'm missing much of it.

Are you a working mom? A work-at-home mom? A work-away-from-home mom? How do you find balance? And are there still opportunities out there to make a real living working from home?

What say you?

Nothing, and then some crappy poetry.

I have started and deleted 10 different posts in the last week.

I start out with a story I think might be funny, and by the end it's just pointless, or worse, sad. Or maybe pointless is worse than sad? Neither is what I'm going for, in any case.

I've got nothing.

But I'm still here.

And I still care about this blog.

And I still want to write for you guys.

So maybe you'll stick with me.

And someday I'll post something worth reading.

I think I should stop this now before this post turns into angsty free verse "poetry."

(the world seems to be
standing still
and moving past me
at the same time.
my eyes open
not seeing
fingers flying
nothing to say.
i'm not really
as depressed as i sound
but maybe i should have had more
than just chocolate
for lunch.
and also
i could probably
use a nap.)

Meet my face.

So, as you've all no doubt already read on my About Me page (which you do have memorized, don't you?), I never really intended for the Pink Lady to become my avatar. It just kind of happened. And I love her, and she's how people know me now, so she's sticking around. And honestly if somebody took a photo of me in a dress and turned it into a silhouette, it would look just like that. So it's honest. So quit bugging me about it.

But, you know...I've been blogging awhile now, and I've got lots of readers who don't know me in real life, and it feels weird that you probably don't know what I look like. I'm not hiding or anything (from you. I may or may not be hiding from the law. So don't tell. But I would never hide from you. We're tight).

So for today's Wordless(ish) Wednesday, I present...

My Face.

    

Cubicle.

I moved. Yesterday I said I was moving? I moved.

Here's where I work now:

cubicle

View of the office from my seat. It's a jungle and I'm invisible. RIGHT??

The view out the window. Collegiate, yes?

The cubicle is large. And open. Very open. But my back is to a wall, and I'm in the corner of the suite, so there's that. Here's my building. The big dark blue part in the middle is the lobby. 120 is the Admissions Office. 140, 150, 160 are different departments. I moved from the 160 suite to the 150:

 So. That's what's going on with me. It's all very dramatic, I know.

And how's your week going?

The Big Reveal

Thank you to everybody who voted for the new header!  I tallied up all your votes and...decided to go with something completely different.  :)

After hearing all your feedback and living with them both for a bit, I decided I liked elements of each, so I asked Melanie at Mommy Doodles Design to make me a couple more options to look at.  She complied, because she's awesome like that.  I was a pretty demanding client considering this is all FREE and I must say she's been patient and wonderful the entire time; responsive, creative, and always willing to go the extra mile.  So thank you, Melanie!  If you're looking for any graphic design work I recommend checking her out (and no, that recommendation was not required or requested as a condition for winning the giveaway; that's totally my own opinion, given totally voluntarily!).

So.  I think what you see now is the final header.  I decided against the darker ones in the end because I do like the lighter, brighter feel.  Also as one commenter noticed, the pink lady was facing the opposite direction in those ones.  I like her facing this way, for whatever reason!  LOL.  So overall this is my choice; I like the lighter colors, the placement of the pink lady, the fun font, and how it kind of flows with the rest of the blog's design.

I love my new look!  It feels grownup and professional.  And since my entire purpose as a blogger is the acquisition of wealth, fame, and power, grownup and professional seems only fitting.  I'm sure my book deal and big-brand advertisers are right around the corner.  :)

What do you think?

Vote on my new header!

Option 1 

Option 2

Well? Which one do you like better?  (Option 1 is currently up on the blog, but not because I like it better.  I honestly don't know which one I prefer.) (Update...and now I've changed it to option 2. I seriously cannot decide, people!)

Both headers are designed by Melanie at Mommy Doodles Design, and I won this opportunity in a giveaway on her blog!  Go check her out.

Some advice.

You know what's weird?  Sometimes when I'm at work I forget to pee.  I mean, literally, I'll sit there all day and never use the facilities.  I get all involved in what I'm doing, and the restrooms are like, aaaaaaall the way down the hall, and it's just a pain, and I'll just do it when I get home.

Yes, the fact that this is even anatomically possible no doubt means I do not drink enough fluids.  That's a subject for a different post.

The point here is what am I thinking?

I'm at work.  Do you know what that means?  It means I can go to the restroom alone.  I can sit down and get comfortable and chances are very, very good that nobody will immediately have an URGENT CRISIS that can only be solved BY ME RIGHT AT THIS MOMENT the second my butt hits the porcelain.

So, working moms?  Just get up and go to the ladies' room.

That's my advice to you.

Whoa.

These are my page views yesterday:

What exactly happened yesterday at 3 p.m.??  Should I be concerned?    

I want a prize. Give me my prize.

Hey.  You know how I'm a sellout and will do anything to win a prize?  You didn't know that?  Oh, ok.  Well, I'm a sellout and will do anything to win a prize.

This blog post contains no funny jokes or amusing anecdotes.  It does, however, contain this:

I'm posting this to enter a contest offered by Cashier Live, a point of sale software company, at Indie Biz Chicks. If you really want to, you can visit their site and enter, too.  


But don't, ok?  Because that would negatively affect my chance of winning.  And you want me to have an iPad, don't you?  Yeah.  You do.

And actually, you know what?  I'm looking at this Indie Biz Chicks site and it's really kind of cool.  The tagline is "For women who'd rather work for themselves than work for The Man."  Dude!  I'm a woman!  And I would SO rather work for myself than work for The Man.  The Man sucks, you guys.

Not men.  Men don't suck, in general.  I have one that I kind of like, for the most part.  But The Man.  That dude is a total buzzkill.

Business Trip

I'm traveling for work today.  Visiting a sister campus in Monterey (CA, not Mexico) to trade ideas.

This means instead of reading this and this from my computer in my office, I'm reading them from a computer lab in beautiful Monterey.

It also means I had lunch here, which would probably more exciting if I drank alcohol. 

Still.  Road trip!  I'm not at work!

Kindergarten Update/Terrible Blog Post

Is there an award for most disappointing blogger?  If so, can somebody please accept it for me?  As you may have noticed, I'm unavailable.

Seriously, I suck at the whole like, you know, following through and not failing thing.  Do I even have any readers left?  I got depressed looking at my stats because for awhile they were steadily rising and then BAM, crash and burn, and I was all, hey, what happened?  And then I realized: I quit posting.

Oh.  So here goes!

As the saying goes (or maybe it's not a saying, maybe it's just something I made up and say in my head when I have writer's block), it doesn't have to be good, it only has to be.

I just realized that probably doesn't apply to a blog with an actual sentient audience as neatly as it applies to my stream of consciousness journal writing/rough draft of the novel that will never come to fruition.  Hmmm.

Oh well.

This morning I dropped the Princess off at kindergarten and realized I've spent my entire adult life making a science of avoiding school zones at 8 and 3, and now I drive directly into the middle of one every day on purpose. And there is no end in sight.  This is now my life.

I never cried on her first day of school.  I thought I was doing so well.  Then we decided (and this is partially my fault, because I'm lazy and always almost-late for work) that she probably didn't need me to walk her all the way to the door anymore, because she knows the way, and I can just drop her off at the sidewalk (the one RIGHT NEXT TO the kindergarten building) and watch her walk around the corner into the very safe and secure fenced-in kindergarten playground and I'm ok with that, and so is she, because she's a big girl, and most of the other moms aren't walking them in anymore, and what am I, some kind of obsessive helicopter parent? Let go already, mommy.

Then we actually did it.  She kissed me goodbye in the car (thank goodness) and told me to have a good day (so cute) and then she just...got out of the car!  And shut the door!  And walked away!  And I sat in my car watching my tiny girl pull on her giant backpack and march confidently into the teeming sea of degenerates children, and then...then I got choked up.  And guys, we've been doing this all week and it isn't getting easier.

Maybe I should just publish some of my stream of consciousness journal writing/rough draft excerpts of the novel that will never come to fruition.

This is really happening.

We're MOVING.  No, I'm totally serious.  We really are this time.  Not like all those other times.

We got that house I mentioned we were going to look at (it's on that page, I promise.  Scroll down).  It's beautiful, it's perfect, and most of all, it's EMPTY!  And it's not across the street from people who think I'm a felony waiting to happen!!  And the kitchen looks like THIS!!

We move in Friday, so if I'm M.I.A. for a few days it's not because I don't love you guys.  I'll be back with lots of fun moving-related stories as soon as I find my laptop.  In the meantime, um...talk amongst yourselves.

Now coming at you with no blogspot!

Ha!  OK loyal readers, guess what?  Today my hubby's favorite website, slickdeals.net, had a very slick deal: a one-year domain registration at GoDaddy for $1.18!  Even tHe O.G. could not deny me my domain for $1.18!

So yes, I am now officially available at www.nearnormalcy.com.  Aaaaaah.  It's so clean.  It's so classy and grownup.  It's so the real deal.  The old blogspot address still works, too, so if you've got it bookmarked you're all set.  And I know you ALL have it bookmarked, right?

Right??


If I were you, though, I would totally update my bookmark to reflect the shiny new URL.  Go ahead.  You know you want to.

not a post so much as a poll

I've noticed a few people stumbling over the word "normalcy" in the title of my blog.  Maybe it's not quite as clean and easy on the tongue as say, "nearly normal," but that one is taken, folks.  Besides, I like that "normalcy" is a noun, a state of being.  It fits the tagline..."and staying there one Zoloft at a time."  I like that "normalcy" is a "place" you can stay "near."

But who cares what I like?  This is about you, and the tens of thousands of people just like you who are just looking for a blog just like this.  So what do you think?  Does my title need a revamp?

Labels

Blogging for Dummies says I need to label my posts.  With, like, clever categories.  Well, it just says categories, I'm the one insisting they be clever.  Because I care.  Because I'm an overachiever.  Because I place importance on excelling at trivial things in order to distract from all the major failures in my life.

But so far the only category I can think of is "random blog posts that I for one found amusing."

I'll work on it, ok?  Stop pressuring me.

Stay posted.

In which I overanalyze Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part II

Um, spoiler alert, people. (Actually if you don't know how Harry Potter ends, just go away now.  I don't think I want you here.  I have standards.)

Oh, also:  nerd alert.  You've been warned.

So, I keep reading that people had a problem with the way Voldemort just believed Narcissa Malfoy when she told him Harry was dead, and never checked for himself.  This bothers people, because really, you've failed to kill this kid how many times, wouldn't you make sure?  I guess.  I can believe, though, that Voldemort's general, all-around hubris would lead him to believe that none of his henchpersons would dare lie to him, especially a Malfoy since they're so pathetic; really what reason would he have to suspect a sniveling terror-stricken Malfoy of having the guts to lie to his face about such a thing?  So I'll buy that one.

My problem (you knew I had one, right?) is with an earlier death: Snape.  Voldemort believes Snape is the true owner of the Elder Wand.  And says as long as Snape lives, the wand won't be his.  But doesn't he mean that he must be the one to kill Snape, to effectively disarm him and thus claim his wand?  I mean, if Snape fell off a cliff, it's not like his wand would just jump into the service of whoever picked it up, would it?  Don't you have to win the wand?

That certainly seems to be Harry's assertion later, when he explains that the wand belongs to him because he disarmed Draco.  Not even killed: disarmed, and not even while Draco was using the Elder Wand!  So apparently all it takes is a well-placed expelliarmus charm to transfer full ownership of a wand from one wizard to another; clearly it's the disarming, not the death, that matters.  [Totally not the point but wouldn't there just be like, random and chaotic wand-loyalty-transference happening all over the place? These kids have been practicing disarming spells since Year 1!].

Granted, Voldemort didn't know all this, about the disarming being enough.  He's focused on the death.  But still, I would think he would grasp the concept that whatever is done to capture the wand from another wizard, if he wants the wand to be his, he should probably do it personally.  Right?  I mean, just to be extra safe?  Right?

So why not just toss a quick and dirty Avada Kedavra Snape's way and have done with it?  Pretty much every other murder he doles out throughout the entire series is committed this way, isn't it?  Voldemort is the king of Avada Kedavra.  It's like his number one hobby.  So why is this death, which is so deliberate and important at this point in the story, different?   

Voldemort doesn't kill Snape at all.  He slits his throat, all sloppy, and then sics the snake on him and saunters away oozing nonchalance:  Eh, he'll die soon enough, I'm sure, and then the wand will most likely be mine, and then, you know, if it all works out, I can continue to carry out the plan I've been obsessing over for 17 years. I mean even in the best-case scenario at this point, Voldy, you didn't kill Snape!  The snake did!  And if that wasn't convenient enough for our heroes, Nagini had a big lunch and wasn't even hungry, because he, too, slithered off with his job half done, opening the door for Harry to slip in, watch Snape die slowly and dramatically, and gather his shiny memory tears which hold the key to the entire series.

No.  I'm sorry, Jo.  I love you tremendously.  But...no.

Now Providing Tech Support

People keep asking me how to subscribe.  So I'm here to help!  Please direct your eyeballs to the right side of the screen.  Slightly higher than this post, probably.  No, your other right.  There.  Right there.  See the button that looks like this?

No, don't try to click the one above, that's just an image.  I just pasted it here as an example.  Go back to the right side of the page.  Click the button over there that looks just like the above button.  Then follow the instructions.

Voila!  That's it.  I think.  At least, it is if you have a Google account.  If you don't, I can't help you, except to say, who doesn't have a Google account?  Just get one, ok?  For goodness sake.